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Writing about secondary infertility & trying to conceive after multiple losses in Gaman (a Japanese term of Zen Buddhist origin which means "enduring the seemingly unbearable with patience and dignity"). Also cooking, Phish, and parenting my beautiful little boy.

Friday, July 13, 2012

Wow - it's been a bit of a crazy week.  My dad has been visiting.  That's been nice but also just difficult to have him stay a week.  But it's too far of a drive back and forth from Philly to make it a shorter trip.  He's had a great time with Simon and Simon keeps running around saying "I love Grandad" so I know he's had a great time too.

Oh, that's Simon's new thing, saying "Simon loves Mommy," or "I love Grandma," or etc.  It's very, very cute.

My appointment went really well on Tuesday.  As well as it could.  My HCG levels dropped to 5, so she told me CD 1 (cycle day 1) would be showing up any day now.  Which it did as of yesterday - YAY!  So that means things are moving along - after this cycle we can start trying again.  If nothing by December then I'll go back for another appointment and see if there are any kinds of intervention steps (like Clomid) we might want to look into or discuss.

I'm supposed to schedule an ultrasound for 8/1 to look at the cyst they found.  She wants to give it time to actually shrink.

And I guess that's pretty much it!  Just really happy to have things moving along.  I'll be MUCH more relieved when 1) the cyst turns out to be nothing and 2) everything goes back to normal with this cycle (as in length and that I ovulate again - sometimes after miscarriages a woman's cycle can get all whacked out and different).

Really no good on the weight front though.  The last week or so I've been binge eating.  I think there are a lot of reasons why but the main thing is not having had the time and consistency to get back into my workout routine.  Once my dad is gone next week I'm getting back to it.  I can't believe how much weight I have to lose.  It depresses me on a daily basis to even look at myself :(

Alright.... well.... off to try to destress some more.

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